Shower Thoughts: Day 3

And now, the afternoon news:
Reports are just in of an armed uprising in the shower region of m's house. Rebels from the seperatist guerilla movement The People's Hair Liberation Front, took control of one side of the shower in what has been described as "a swift and ruthless assault". It is thought that the purpose of the uprising was to prevent the authorities (m and his housemates) from settng foot in the area. The Guerillas- described as "clingy" and "horribly ugly"- held the area for 2 minutes demanding that m leave the shower, before making a rash attack on his feet. What followed was a running battle as the guerillas advanced on the plughole, taking a number of hostages on the way. The situation was defused with what onlookers described as "a swift sidestep and a splash of water" causing the rebels to lose nerve and flee down the plughole. m is said to be unscathed by the incident but comments "It was awful. I thought they had me for a moment- the look on their faces will haunt me for years." The foreign office suggests that if anyone is planning a visit to the area they should inform a relative of their whereabouts and, if long hairs may be present, consider enlisting the professional protection of a shower cap.
In other news, m's housemate reports that "m has too much work to do and should stop wasting his time."