Shower Thoughts: Day 5

Oh crap, a week since my last post...

Anyway, I haven't shaved my head for far too long and I've developed this kind of fuzz- some might call it hair. So today's shower was filled with musings on the novel sensation of having wet hair. I don't like it. It sticks.

And that's all for today... I need food.

Shower Thoughts: A Brief Interlude

Just for the record, I do shower at the weekend. Time, it seems, has managed once again to shorten itself largely because of a number of things that are going on in my house that have caused me to have to become far too serious for a weekend. Not good. Expect a return to the world that exists between my ears shortly...

Shower Thoughts: Day 4

Aaaaaaaaaaaargh, it's 11am
I'm late
I'm late
I'm late
Oh why do I waste my life in bed
Oh why do I waste my life in bed
Oh why do I waste my life in bed
Damn, damn, damn.

So proceded today's shower thoughts...

Shower Thoughts: Day 3

And now, the afternoon news:
Reports are just in of an armed uprising in the shower region of m's house. Rebels from the seperatist guerilla movement The People's Hair Liberation Front, took control of one side of the shower in what has been described as "a swift and ruthless assault". It is thought that the purpose of the uprising was to prevent the authorities (m and his housemates) from settng foot in the area. The Guerillas- described as "clingy" and "horribly ugly"- held the area for 2 minutes demanding that m leave the shower, before making a rash attack on his feet. What followed was a running battle as the guerillas advanced on the plughole, taking a number of hostages on the way. The situation was defused with what onlookers described as "a swift sidestep and a splash of water" causing the rebels to lose nerve and flee down the plughole. m is said to be unscathed by the incident but comments "It was awful. I thought they had me for a moment- the look on their faces will haunt me for years." The foreign office suggests that if anyone is planning a visit to the area they should inform a relative of their whereabouts and, if long hairs may be present, consider enlisting the professional protection of a shower cap.
In other news, m's housemate reports that "m has too much work to do and should stop wasting his time."

Shower Thoughts: Day 2

Today was the start of a new university term and despite having only about 10 hours of lectures a week I had the misfortune to land one at 9am today. I am not accustomed to early starts. My house isn't even accustomed to early starts; when I got up at 7am the heating wasn't yet on and, as we are all aware, cold is not conducive to thought- hence no discernable shower thoughts. Altogether a bad start. I then proceeded to spend the next five minutes in paralysing fear. So cold was I that once I had braved getting wet, the thought of having any part of me exposed to the cold for more than 1 millisecond resulted in me oscillating between vibrating frantically in an attempt to maintain constant wetness, and standing dead still, tensing everly muscle I could muster at such an early hour and with eyes bulging fixing a stare that could melt steel on the closest object- in this case the soap sitting inncoently on the side. The result thus resembled a rabbit in the headlights effect followed quickly by the same rabbit breaking down in an epileptic fit. I'm just glad there were no witnesses...

Shower Thoughts: Day 1

As is good marketing practice, this first day comes to you with two thoughts for the price of one.

1) Ask yourself this: what can possibly happen in the confines of the domestic shower to cause one to question one's identity? Well, this morning the safety bubble of the shower was broken. What ensued was an identity crisis brought on by the seemingly innocent observation that I always start my shower by washing my left armpit. Allow me to elaborate. I consider myself to be a well-rounded, spontaneous kind of person. I tend to rebel against rules and prescribed patterns of behaviour, hence, the observation that I've been stuck in a routine for some time worried me to the point of wondering: what am I actually like? Is my ususal spontaneity merely a psychological trick I perform on myself in order to hide from myself the reality of the left-armpit-washing seeker of constancy. Or, worse, am I actually in the habit of being spontaneous? As you can see, these questions threaten to undermine the fundamentals of my self- respect and ego, hence, without further ado, I employed man's greatest weapon against deep thought, and distracted myself with something trivial.

2) Or is it trivial? I'll let you decide. I simply made the observation that the shower is one of very few places in which one experiences having a warm face (other examples may include during the use of a hairdryer and whilst wearing a balaclava). In fact, since being a foetus, I can't recall any other time when I've enjoyed the sensation so much... So, please- next time you take a shower, warm your face and think back to the warm-faced days of old.

Shower Thoughts: The Beginning...

I've just had a shower- as I do every morning (or afternoon). Whilst showering I managed to conjure up a thought; more specifically, I thought of an idea for my blog. I thought that maybe, just maybe, it might be interesting to document my daily shower thoughts. As we all know, our most profound and enlightening moments come when in the bathroom, either in the shower or on the toilet. So there it is, a new premise for a, to-date, rather directionless blog. Over the course of time it is hoped that my experiment will shed new scientific light on the age-old questions of: what is the effect of warm water on the brain? What is the most sung song in the shower? and, to what extent can random fluctuations in water temperature drive a man crazy? I know: sacrificing myself for the greater good of science. It might sound crazy but I, for one, am committed to removing the ignorance of the greater part of humanity by finally revealing, once and for all: just what does go on in the average brain whist in the shower? And I, the noble scientist, invite you, the intrepid reader, to join me in my quest for enlightenment: to boldly go where no blog has gone before.

hmmm

A nice shiny new blog and a head almost totally bereft of thoughts, such a shame.

Ahhh, a new blog

Hi all, well.. just me at the moment, but hey, you've got to start somewhere. Well here we (by "we" i mean "I") are, after initially hating the idea of bloggs my curiosity, boredom, insomnia and thirst for attention (sad but, I fear, true) have combined to cause me to be sitting here at 1:40 am writing this, and, well... I kind of like it. So, welcome. Right, down to business... I intend to use this blog as a kind of overflow pipe for my overcrowded brain. Into it I shall pour a selection of my rambling, weird, and often slightly disturbed thoughts. Ahhh, just like any other blog, I hear you say. Well... yes, the difference being, of course, that this one is about me. Sound interesting...? Well ok, maybe not. Nevertheless I shall continue undeterred, and, if you have nothing better to do or just fancy a wander around my brain, by the power invested in me by the anonymity of the intenet, I invite you to join me... Please leave as many comments as you like; they may make me feel appreciated... and that's nice. So, here we go...

Oh, I can't resist it

Well, I held out for ten minutes before feeling the need to add something- I'm still not sure exactly what. Anyway, being a student i have a lot of time on my hands (you may start hating me now). Right now I'm back at university waiting for term to start and in the meantime finding increasingly tenuous reasons for not working. Actually, no, that's not fair- I have done a lot of work this Christmas- but who cares about that. Anyway, today was mostly spent wandering to and fro around the internet. During my travels I chanced upon a number of bloggs- of varying quality. I couldn't help but wonder what it is that makes people feel the need to share random parts of their lives with total strangers- it can't just be boredom. Well, I'm sure there there are as many reasons as there are bloggs, but whatever the reason, there's something rather nice about it all. It reminds me of Lost in Translation (one of my favourite films)- it's a place where you can share a level of intimacy that is only possible with people you don't share your everyday life with. Actually, having said that it sounds quite sad... Anyway, that's my thought for today... why do we blog?